five days left...oooooh nelly. This is terrible. Looks like I'm definitely on my own. We've come to the end of the road, I can't do this anymore. I have lost virtually everything. And it's never coming back because I'm moving next month :( I'm going to end school depressed, beatup, and alone. There isn't any time left to forgive myself for everything I'd fought not to loose. A week will not be much to end ALL THIS?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!!!!!!!!! no way in hell, I don't have balls.
after six long years I'm going back to basics.. Time's about to repeat itself, until I'm a college grad with not much to live. It's going to be hell until then... I should look back... Six months ago I attended community college. That was fun. Met new people, didn't work out too well. Still don't know their names. It takes me forever to learn them, but I'll never forget faces. now I'm going to university. How the fuck did that happen. Well technically I don't know for sure if I'll get accepted. Shit, I never received anything back from FIDM! but I know where I'm moving too, if I get in it'll be a beautiful place. Two bedrooms, pool, separate bathrooms, the works.
I guess I'll always be a jealous bitch. I do have friends, but it doesn't feel right. I'm always putting my life in jeopardy because of it. It sucks, because im never going to see those people ever again. They never hung out with me, only see them in school. It's all too late. They don't realize that when I leave, I'm gone for good. I'll be two hours away from this awful place. it'll be impossible. And the fact that I've had friends hurts the most. I'll fuck it all up, they'll avoid me two- three months at a time. But when I resolve a friendship it's always at the last minute. School's over. I messed up my whole fucking year because of this. It'll be completely gone next week. But nobody cares, because they'll say that it's all nonesense because of Facebook? talking to you online is not the same as physically seeing you. Ughhhhh.....
Thursday, May 19, 2011
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